Base: God is the Center

As two people who deeply love to serve others, we quickly realized that although service keeps us connected in compatibility, it can also lead to reflecting on how intentionally we spend our time together. Whether it is in the community, at church, with family and friends, for youth, with our businesses, or just random moments that come up, we humbly love to give to others. I think it is the thing that drew us to each other and something we can always turn to fill our cup.

Something that has come up along this journey is that doing things together begins to bring other people and things to our center orbit of our relationship. Meaning, when we are trying to find groundedness and centering in our relationship, and everyone/everything becomes just as important as our relationship, our relationship then takes a back seat in being a priority. Our therapist help to illustrate this in a way that kept us truly connected—we talked about the game of tag. When we all played tag as kids, we would declare a space as “base”, which was immune from anyone tagging you out. She mentioned that God needed to be our base—the safe and immune place from being tagged by anyone or anything around us. This also means that we are immune from the guilt, shame, irritation, continuing bother, misplaced responsibility, and any other emotional experiences that come with helping others. This was where the skill set really kicked in.

The greatest lesson is that God has to be our center because it provides all that we need consistently individually and as a couple. Additionally, we have to agree on this base together. Nothing else can serve as our base—work, expectations, family/friends, or any emotional weight. It has to be us and God finding our base, and THEN we take on the world. <3